Awkward
by ViDez
Summary: In which Teddie asks a short question that leaves the Investigation Team speechless.  "What's a boner?"


_Inspired by a prompt on the P4 kinkmeme._

_No pairings._

_Enjoy._

* * *

><p><em>...What.<em>

The whole table went quiet, and everyone craned their heads to stare at the blond with incredulous expressions on their faces.

"What's a boner?" Teddie repeated after a few moments of silence, an adorably bemused expression on his face.

Kanji blushed and only managed to stammer out bits and pieces of his jumbled thoughts, totally unable to form a coherent sentence.

"I-I- who- _what-_-?"

Chie and Yukiko opted to keep their mouths shut and merely stared at Teddie like he suddenly grew two heads, a pair of bat wings, a lizard tail, and started making cow noises. Naoto blinked, and continued sipping her soda at a much slower rate, secretly curious to see how this all panned out.

Rise sent a small glare at Yosuke, who dared utter the word in the shadow's presence.

"It's nothing, Teddie." The idol replied curtly and shoved a generous amount of salad in her mouth to signal she wasn't talking anymore on the matter.

"But Yosuke said something about a 'boner'!" Teddie pouted. "And I dunno what a boner is!" A bright smile reappeared on his face, "So what is it?"

Yukiko averted her face to the side to try and distract herself from the suddenly awkward air surrounding the Investigation Team. Chie, instead of following her best friend's lead, let a slow smirk appear on her face as she eyed Yosuke.

"Why don't you ask Yosuke?" She suggested sweetly. "He's the one who said it, after all."

Yosuke started spluttering, 'Wh-What? I can't explain something like that!" He yelped. "It's too hard!"

Rise couldn't help it; she burst into giggles at the unintentional double entendre. The headphone-wearing brunette glared weakly at the redhead.

Yosuke turned to Teddie, "...Why don't you ask the other guys?" His voice held a hopeful lilt to it. When Teddie turned his attention away from him, the teen let out a relieved sigh.

Kanji was _still_ unable to form a coherent sentence, and his face was as red as a fire truck. So, that only left...

"Sensei!" The blonde chirruped at the IT's calm, reliable leader. He repeated the question.

Souji rested his chin on top of his entwined fingers, a benign smile playing at his lips.

"Well, a boner is-"

"Partner!" Yosuke squawked and jumped to his feet. "You're not _serious_ about actually-?"

"Shh!" Teddie pulled the male back down to his seat with surprising strength, and turned towards Souji with an expectant smile on his face. "Continue sensei."

The Wild Card seemed unfazed, that patient and strangely devious smile still plastered on his face.

"When someone says that they made a boner, they mean that they made a blunder - a stupid and embarrassing mistake." Souji defined.

Yosuke slumped in his seat and flashed a grin at his friend, mouthing _'good save'_ to him.

Teddie furrowed his eyebrows, "But that doesn't really make sense..." He muttered. "Um, I overheard two other guys walking past saying that his girlfriend was 'sucking off his boner' or something... How can you 'suck-off' a mistake? And what _is_ sucking off anyway?"

Naoto fought the urge to let out an uncharacteristic snort from behind the lip of her soda can.

"...There are two meanings to the word 'boner', Teddie." The boyish female finally decided to speak up, putting down her drink. "In other words it is a penile erection. It is considered a physiological phenomenon where the-"

"Naoto-kun," Yukiko interjected quietly. "I-I don't think Teddie will get it if you explain it _that_ way."

The bluenette blinked, shrugged, and continued nursing her drink.

Speaking of Teddie, he was starting to look quite frustrated. "What's a boner?" He parroted in an impatient tone. "Pleaseplease_please_ I wanna know!"

Souji sighed, "Teddie..." He began. "Do you remember one of my Personae? Do you remember _Mara_?"

The others exchanged embarrassed glances. Oh yes; they remembered that Persona. When their calm, cool and collected leader summoned it into battle for the first time, they... well, they were struck speechless. Souji was unfazed by the weird glances he was getting from the rest of the dungeon run.

The 'human's eyes brightened up at the familiar name; Teddie bobbed his head once, "Yep! It was really _big_, sensei! Like, _reaaallly_ big."

...

"...That's right." Souji, after a moment of stunned silence, grinned in a smug manner. "Like Naoto said, there are two meanings to the word boner. Now, Mara represents what the other meaning of it is. In fact, if you're looking for a boner, it'll probably look like that - its long body, of course."

Teddie's blue eyes were wide, "Even the tentacles?"

Souji frowned in a thoughtful manner,

"...I guess it depends on whether the 'tentacles' were removed or not - either by a razor or _waxing_." He eventually settled on. The others - more notably Yosuke and excluding Naoto - flinched at the reply.

"That sounds painful." Teddie commented.

"I heard the waxing was especially painful." Souji nodded solemnly, and then he sent a sly _look_ at Yosuke. "Isn't that right, _partner_?"

It was Yosuke's turn to get stared at.

"..."

"..."

"_..."_

_...!_

"_It was a bet, okay?"_ He finally wailed under all the pressuring eyes. "A stupid bet! And I wish I could've taken it back! The pain wasn't worth it!"

Teddie gasped. "Yosuke made a boner!" He proclaimed. "Do you need someone to 'suck it off'?"

The brunette groaned in response, hiding his now-red face behind his palm.

"Teddie!" Chie announced and stood up, along with Yukiko. "Let's go buy some topsicles!"

The bear squealed in delight, "Okay~!"

* * *

><p>As the two girls and shadow left, Yosuke sent a weak glare at Souji.<p>

"Partner," He deadpanned. "I hate you."

"I love you, too." Souji flashed a quick smile at him.

Rise gazed oddly at their leader, "So..." She began prodding, "is Mara compensating or something? _Over_compensating...?"

"Senpai!" Kanji yelped out.

Grey eyes returned Rise's gaze, "Well, Mara is _my_ Persona, isn't it?"

...

Souji took a sip of his TaP under everyone else's stares.


End file.
